Originally featured on Wicked Cool Women.
When the going gets tough, I have two approaches to dealing with stress – flight or fight.
Depending on the situation, who’s involved, my mood, the impact of “what could be” makes me respond differently to stress triggers.
This week I asked a handful of women to share their tips for reducing stress, why, and how they benefit. The timing of their responses was perfect as this was a week full of expected and unexpected stressors. And for both scenarios my flight sense was in high motion.
My flight sense was in high motion
For the first time in over two years, I had to go into the office to be around a bunch of colleagues for strategy sessions and team building exercises. I enjoy these people and was excited to be with them. I’m also an introvert, which most people are surprised to hear—it’s true. Because of this, I expected to be exhausted by the time I got home Thursday night. I was out of town for three of the 4 days adding more to my need to retreat behind closed doors upon my return.
The unexpected addition to the trip was a major organizational announcement at the company I work for. Although not surprised by anything stated in the memo, including people who are moving on and others promoted or shuffled around, the overall impact is HUGE, and the message gives me pause triggering this thing called stress.
For a bit I couldn’t concentrate on anything. I kept thinking about what was not said in the announcement. I wasn’t feeling excited about it, and I needed to get home!
Then I pulled out the stress reducing tips shared with me earlier this week (perfect timing!) I picked a few and sure enough I was able to alter my mindset into a calm, more rational state creating a different perspective with a more positive outlook.
Here’s the list of 11 practical tips to reduce stress quickly
Number 1: Change your focus by thinking about something that makes you happy. Something you’ve experienced where you’re able to go back to that place in your mind to relive the feeling of joy. Alternatively, transcend towards a place of happiness—something you’re looking forward to.
For me, it was leaving the office (an hour and a half commute) and stopping in a different town on the way home to watch my son and his team work together to win another baseball game. My place of happiness was the anticipation of knowing I would be surrounded by positive energy from people who shared a common goal.
Number 2: Shock your energy through sound and movement by doing a little jig. Most of us carry our cell phone and earbuds on the regular. Simply find a comfortable spot, plug in your earpiece, turn up your music and dance around. Our bodies are made up of matter and energy. You’ll be amazed how your body and mind react after just a few minutes of dance. Once you stop, take notice of the vibrations in your hands, legs, all over. This is your energy flowing through you. It’s electrifying!
Number 3: Restore your inner calm through mediation. I often hear people say they are unable to meditate or aren’t sure if they’ve reached a meditative state. Give it a try—meditation is for everyone. A common practice to get you started is the square breathing exercise. Find a quiet place to sit comfortably, put your hands on your lower belly, then follow these five steps:
Begin by slowly exhaling your breath out and visualize a square
Then, gently inhale through your nose to a slow count of 4 (imaging the first line in the square)
Hold your breath for a count of 4 (drawing the second line of the square)
Then, gently exhale through your mouth for a count of 4 (third line of the square)
As you release your breath pause and hold for the count of 4 (this is the fourth and final connection to making a visual square)
Do this exercise just a few times and you’ll physically and mentally calm down.
Number 4: Take notice of your surroundings. Similar to “stop and smell the roses” looking around your environment will distract you from the stress in the moment. This doesn’t mean the stress goes away, the goal is to get out of a state of reaction—as in “I need a minute,” which is okay to say and do. I applied this tip to my situation this week by taking a 10-minute walk around the office space. What I found was two-fold:
Corporate America working at its best, not delving into the reality of the matter. What I mean is in standard practice everything is messaged in a positive, planful way; all is wonderful, and we are wonderful. The reality is little of that is true with changes at this scale. Stuff went down, it’s unplanned, and we are dealing with it the best we can. We’ll be okay, but it’s going to take some time for changes to settle. As leaders this should be acknowledged, not swept under the rug.
By walking around, what I noticed was people connecting quietly as if not to be found out they were talking about the big announcement. I was getting text messages, instant messages, emails, “do you have a minute?” My stress was shared, and I engaged in conversation. We talked about the changes and what it felt like to each person. Checking in with each person to ensure they are okay helped me release my own feelings. Feeling helpful rather than helpless was key in the moment.
Number 5: Laughing lifts a mood and what’s an easy way to have a giggle—watch funny cat videos. According to a 2015 study by an Indiana University Media School researcher, Jessica Gall Myrick, “The Internet phenomenon of watching cat videos… does more than simply entertain; it boosts viewers’ energy and positive emotions and decreases negative feelings.”
Number 6: Go outside to enjoy the clean, crisp air while absorbing the beauty of nature. Look up at the movement or stillness in the sky, watch the leaves on trees flutter in the wind, touch the bark of a tree, smell a flower in the garden, or catch a snowflake glistening in the air. Nature is a natural calming element to our senses.
Number 7: Give yourself a hug. Wrap your arms around yourself and gently squeeze or ask someone for a hug. People respond well to, “I need a hug,” so ask when in need; and remember to reciprocate when someone asks you for that gentle touch of a hug. Another option is to grab a blanket and wrap yourself in it. The weight and warmth of the blanket creates a hug-like substitute.
Number 8: Sip on a steaming cup of tea or coffee; or a refreshing beverage of your choosing. I often choose a lemon tea with a touch of honey for a hint of sweetness. It’s a soothing warmth that flows inside with each sip leaving me feeling more content than stressed.
Number 9: Snuggle up with your four-legged friend. Need I say more?
When I returned home from my trip, I’m not sure who was more excited me or my beagle doggie-dog. I couldn’t wait to give him loves. After all, I’ve spent every day, nearly all day with him in my home office for two-plus years. The touch of his fur and warm body instantly relaxed me. Once I settled in, hugged my kids and husband, my 10-year-old pooch snuggled by my feet with his blanket. My dog is surely a woman’s best friend.
Number 10: Stretch your neck or roll your head in circles. This method will help alleviate tension building up around your head, neck, and shoulders and you’ll feel the release during the exercise. Well worth the few minutes!
Number 11: Unplug. (This one needs planning!) We read about it all the time and research suggests we spend upwards of 16-hours a day on one of our many screens. Use your “screen time” and “do not disturb” features to limit interruptions during personal hours. As a matter of fact, create personal hours for yourself as that line is quite blurred this day in age; even declare an Unplugged Day for a media detox with no cell phone, no social media, no streaming videos, movies, TV shows.
Thanks for all the helpful hints from my network.
If you have a quick stress reducing tip you want to share, post a comment below.